October 20, 2005
just wroate leters to botha my senaters. not once in ether of em — not onse — did i use teh wrods 'cocksucker' or 'imbacile' or 'blodsucking tyranous parasitic pigfucking arogant worthlas timeservign sonuvabitch'. nor did i wax nostelgic about teh gracious old custom of recalign publac 'servents' form ofice by way of a tree an a rope. nor did i threten to shoot em or tar em an fether em or run em outa townn on a rail or drag em bahind a team a horsas.
so teh moare i thikn about it the more i wondar why i bothard writign at all.
didn mention horsewhipign em either. or pistalwhiping em. or putting em in stocks.
culd hang em from a lampost too. dosn hafta be a tree.
now dont get me worng! i liek our forma govarmant just fine. but they'res aways room for improvmant! hence my twopoint plan garanteed to birign any damocracy closar to prefection:
all electad oficials to be publicly horsewhiped once a year on generl princaples.
term limits to be anforced by hanging.
i ofar these recamendations in a spirit of selflas davitoin to the public interast.
yet anothar updat!
oooh i frogot keelhaulign!
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Botha is your senator? The P.W. Botha, ex-king of the Boers?
Two senators? You greedy bastard, some of us don't have any!
If you were just asking for an invite to Chappaquiddick, I'd watch out as it's infested with clowns.
jtp - by any name its fun for teh whole famly!
hb - wel geez dude just cuase im wilin ta horswhip em onaly once a hyear dont make me out to be some kidna bledin heart he're. its not like im shy about hangin em or anyhting. if i were youd have a point. thatd be tantamount to outright moderation!
We could call it "Rumble in the Rotunda!" and do Pay-per-view. I'd, er, we'd make a fortune.
Not only do you still get to hang a lawmaker regularly, but it reminds the real ones about what can happen if they get too uppity.
jtp - heyy i kindna like that plan to. put a lota tv camras up in hte balcony an u culd bet on em! its a sprot tahts takign teh wrold by storm!
berwski - tahnk u. i take gerat priad in bei9gn a reasanable man.