October 10, 2005

Professional Wrestling

I would like to thank Mr. Hynes, who, even though he is only an American, has very graciously provided me with this forum to share my views with the younger generation. An American, you should know, that is a kind of foreigner, but he has been very kind, and not at all impertinent, unlike that quite frightening man at Emerald Bile.

A-hem, a-hem. Today I would like to talk to you about sport.

The Americans have a sport, or they call it a sport, called Professional Wrestling, which is not a sport at all, in my opinion. It is very fat men, in outlandish costumes, who if you must know behave very unprofessionally, indeed. One must ask, is this how their professional classes, learn the meaning of professionalism? By watching fat men hit each other with chairs, and jump on their heads, and other disgraceful things? You can imagine a doctor, who hits a colleague who contradicts him, with a chair, because he has been taught nothing else. That is not how doctors behave in civilized countries, at all. You cannot rely on the medical or scientific judgement, of such a doctor, or at least I would not choose to. But that is how it is, in America. You have no choice.

But what is most frightening, is that professional wrestling, is a fraud. It is staged. We know this, in the civilized part of the world, but the Americans do not. It is kept from them. There must be tens of millions of Americans, it is reasonable to infer, who follow this "sport", and it provides their moral framework, as well as their idea of interpersonal relations. And because they are all so heavily armed, it is frightening to imagine, what they will do when they learn the truth, and that they have been deceived so shamefully, for so long.

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It is frightening and it seems terribly reckless posting secrets like that on an American blog. Perhaps your study of Professional Wrestling has had a negative effect on your judgment as well, Doctor.
There's nothing to worry about, Sean. Americans don't use the Internet, except for Mr. Hynes, perhaps, but he is one of the more clever ones.
Moral framework shmoral framework Doctor H. My favourites are the British Bulldogs. The way they smack their opponents about. Whoah, that’s GOTTA hurt. As a doctor you should know this.
The "Noreen comma" has reached epidemic proportions in this post. Unless, you are, shouting, Helen, or, sexually aroused, why do you, need to pause, for breath, so often?
Mr. Bunny: Per, haps, I over, did it. But you, cannot be too, careful, you know.

Dr. Maroon: Yes, and they're quite attractive, too!
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