August 03, 2006
dear redars! ok i opand my mail wich i usuly dont do bcause quite fanrkly teh ladies are prety much in awe of me already but anyhow i gota emial form my brothar!
I just Gogoled marthambles [he tlaks funy liek that — ed] and your blog came up like 5th. You epicene freak. What is your fucking problem? The next time you see me coming you'd better run, as the poet sang, and that's all I've got to say about it, motherfucker. "Marthambles", my ass...
so ive gota raquest to meake! i dont wana be fith. i wannna be first dammit!
so anyboddy up for gloogal bobmign me? just paiste the folawign crap inta evary post on ur bolg! in evary comant! put it in ur sidebar and your tital thigny!
youl get ur raward in heaven i promise you. an youll have the geretar rweweard of beign part of someghing biger then yourself. somethign menignful. something that tarancends our pety difrances an binds us togathar in oru comon humanity. also its pointles an realy stupid!
i thuoght 'epacene' was a bit harsh.
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Can't help but note that marthambles is not amusingly misspelled. Don't go all conventional on us, now, 3H. Did you not trust us to recognize the word? Surely you know by now that all your regulars are depressingly well acquainted with obscure diseases.
Meanwhile, update your post to include the blog link not on "your blog came up" but on the word marthambles itself. May as well lead the way by demonstrating proper link techniques on your own disheveled desk.
Secondly, I agree with ITT on who the real nutjob is. Some siblings inherit it all wacko DNA, which must account for Triple-H's lack thereof.
Thirdly, ITT is completely off their rocker about the spelling of marthambles, which is both correct and incorrect at the sametime, thus demonstrating our four corner stage life as irrefutable proof of the omnific, infinite, ineffable cubic nature of God, you singularity dumbass.
A hapax legomenon so far, marthambles should be elevated to greater semantic status, by using it to refer to the irksome perambulations of Martha Stewart. Her aimless ambulatory meanderings, inflicted upon an unsuspecting public, will inevitably end up posing a threat to the general public. In the Dept of Domestic Freedomisation's color-coded terror alert chart, orange/high should be replaced with "lavender: marthambles"--high risk of Martha ambling by. The fellows at DHS need to get their priorities right.
Secondly, I ambiently depreciate the imprecation that I, or anyone associated of by myself, has this disgusting (and anyway probidly apothetical) condition.