tody were gona trasnlate teh aneind wich is a real old poam by a romen.

Arma virumque cano

'virille' maens 'man' an a cano is a dog. sso that means a werwolf. 'arma' is easy. anybody whos ever wached public tv knows teh roumens didant prounounce their 'r's. so if you say it that way out loud u cantell hjes saying 'im a virumque cano' menign 'im a weerewolf'. see? its a snap.

Troiae qui primus ab oris

'primus' is waht u cook with an 'oris' is a root so hes miakign diner.

Italiam fato profugus Laviniaque venit

ok! hes talkkign abuot itely but ud thinnk since the romons lived the'yre theyd be able to spel it right? but mabe vrigil he hada spech defect. so anyhow the itlaliams are fat an theyre pro fungus. i can vuoucht for taht! i hada real good risoto with musrhooms a couple weeeks back. ok an then its somethign about lavinia. i knew a gril in schol by that nmanme. she wrote godawfal poetrry. probly it means lavianias etign fungus by the vent.

litora, multum ille et terris iactatus et alto

yep must be 'vent' cauose hes sayigin he means it litorally. er else now hes talkging about lavinias lady parts. but its more likely he means teh vent on the stoave. ok now 'teris' might be a terrine or else shes scared. but 'scared' makes no senscte because its alredy been specafied shes likes funngus. so shes eatgin a terrine thats fula mushroms. with a glassa milk. an finaly a alto is a saxapohone.

duno waht the rest is. looks like som kina foren gabble to me.

so to recapuitulate he'res teh story sofar

im a werewolf cookign roots for funguslovign lavinia
teh tiailian ladey drinkging milk. by the vent. no really!
but she only wantsto play her saxaphaone.

its shapign up to be a romantic comedy.