March 17, 2006

vender truouble

who is this asshole?

this box came and there was this contextfree asshole on it. theres no caption explaining who he is. hes just a asshole on the box for no good reson. so i caled the vendor and siad 'this product is unaceptable. its got a asshole. a smug one'. an theyw erelike 'huh?' so i siad 'no seriously ive gtot teh purcaase order right here and we ordard the dvd writar alright but theres no mention of a ashsole'.

so they go like 'sir im goina hafta termanate this call. ive iformaed my suparviser that ur beign abusiave.' so im like 'my ass im beign fucking abusive. i ask a suimpal qeustsoin an ur like all hostal. what gives? is tihs how u treat custoamars? u think ur goina build a busness this way? firts u send us a asshoale we didn orde r an than not only wont u admit it hapand but ur actign like im teh unresoneble one.'

somwher during that spech she hugn up.

so i sent em teh unit back. wiht a dead rat in the box.


briso has ben subjectad to a similer horer! is thare no ascape?!

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Not only is he free of context, but he doesn't appear to have any teeth, either.
He's the Writer. Should have been in the box.
I think Anonymous has it right. Otherwise I'd have to assume that he's there with that smirk to show us how satisfied we'd be once we owned the thing-- the smug bastard.
He looks like one of those smug pricks in the Banana Republic ads.
That's a picture of Bill Murray in his next movie, about two years from now. Taking the ideao fearly marketing a bit too far, I suppose.

I like it how the gradual shift from standard English to Arlingtonese is an accurate indication of your rising level of anger.
I dunno, he looks like a writer to me. I bet if you buy an HP printer you get a picture of a guy in an apron with reading glasses and a visor with inkstained fingers. A monitor box would feature, I dunno, a Civil War ironclad maybe...Wonder who's on the hard drive box? Scanner?
phil - wel if u we're taht smug sombodyda knocked out ur teath to.

anonymo - writars are cnuts!

vagague - so ur with me on wny he neds a bop in teh snoot! excelent.

anomouns - hmm! not a bad idear.

desiarnaz - but in lostin tarnation mury was rely funy.

plogrune - hp has gotan to clevar. they must die.
wel if u we're taht smug sombodyda knocked out ur teath to

It has been tried.
Fucking hell. I just bought an HP printer-copier-scanner-toaster-microwave thing, and look.
lmp86 - hoally crap!
phil - so is it ur teth are rely dureble or u got good ralflexes? or just dentuares?
"Hoally crap" indeed. The answer is simple. They're like a serving suggestion, showing us how smug we should feel for having bought one of hp's fine products.
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